Thanks to watching a video of a live stream Agony Autie posted I was pointed at an interesting musician going by the name of MNDSGN, additionally intrigued as she mused on whether he was autistic given the words to his songs. Not only did I love the music, given that it was a combination of all the sounds I used to like from 80s funk an soul, but the words started getting to me as well. This is unusual for me as I generally avoid music with lyrics, partly because concentrating on words and music simultaneously is a bit of a problem.
The song she “stim dances” to is Lather from the album Body Wash
For each song, I’ll quote some words and put some thoughts afterwards.
Sometimes you’re thinking
What planet am I really on
Sometimes it ain’t clear
What vibrations that really are
You try your best to keep it moving
Dreaming about the day you quit losing your mind
It might be sooner than later
That doesn’t need too much interpretation as autism has been compared to being from the “wrong planet” many times. But the line about losing your mind also resonates.
All along you thought you belong
You’d have thought after coming from so far
That you could find a place that can call home
But you still can’t find the right way
All along you thought this was the truth
Accepted this life without proof
Somewhere along the lines
You lost your way
This is like feeling life isn’t quite working. You’ve taken what the world is supposed to be at face value. You’ve tried to be what the world seems to want you to be but nobody has explained why it’s supposed to work that way.
Use Ya Mnd (Twentyfourseven)
You gotta use your mind
You gotta love your mind
You ain’t gotta be a fool again
Not many words in this song, but means two things simultaneously. Autistic people have to use their rational processing constantly to figure out and adapt to the world, so we are forced to constantly analyse behaviour minutely moment to moment.
What the song also seems to say something about is caring for your mind – mental health.
Also, it’s using your mind to avoid being used (made a fool of). You don’t have to be fooled again. No!
Everything about your vibe
If we could see
Expression on your face
It’s so vague
It’s so hard to read even one little thing in your expression
It’s so vague
We need just a little clarity
This one is more self-explanatory.
I may be more receptive to songs that touch on feelings of isolation or confusion with life after having made some emotional connection with words here. But as is the case with good poetry, it’s better if it’s not too specific and can apply in different contexts.