Carrying on a little from the last post, relating to why posts don’t get published – where there are a large number of drafts in between sporadic posting.
Attention or focus has been a tricky thing as long as I can remember. I don’t lack an ability to focus – directing the focus is slippery, like trying to catch a salmon with my hands.
Focus can consume when there’s strong interest – but where there is no interest motivation evaporates.
For example writing a blog post may have a fascinating idea in the middle – but sitting down to hash out sentences might suddenly become very dull and that is where distraction emerges, like the woodlouse near my feet that I wanted to watch as I’m sitting in the garden.
Getting a blog post out isn’t only about an attempt to express something – it’s hampered by ideas that it’s supposed to be like an article in a newspaper.
I ask myself why I’m potentially worried someone might think my thoughts are a disorganised jumble on a personal blog – even if it’s not polished someone can come by and derive something from it.
Is this about attention and focus or me just wanting the satisfaction of having rambled and pressed “publish”.
Perhaps the actual point is habits over goals and systems – a habit of writing something manageable and “letting it go” rather than thinking I need a system to enable me to get anything done.
Now I’ve realised I was going to write about keeping things visible – and because I wasn’t looking at the mind map I’ve started using again I forgot that was the point.
The drafts and blog posts are not visible at a glance because the WordPress app needs me to go in and scroll through lists.
If you can get something on a canvas on one screen it can be more obvious what is calling for attention – the task that is coloured purple with a weird font and a fluorescent border.
This colour and quirkiness is stimulating to the distracted brain – perhaps the colours can mean more than the words.
Who knows if this post is “finished”, but I can’t spend more time on it and would rather have the satisfaction of publishing.